The Trouble With Names.

A teacher confesses her most regular, and possibly most embarrassing, classroom faux pas.

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Your Teacher Apologises

The classroom is busy in a studious kind of way. Students are working on the task I have assigned them, and I am making my way around the room, checking in with each student to see if they need any help or clarification. The tone of the room is positive and the level of noise is low.

I know these kids well enough to know some of their hobbies and interests, which ones love reading, which ones are sporty, and which ones are the introverts who would rather work alone than in a group situation. Suffice to say, I know their names.

As I move toward the first girl in the next row, I quietly whisper to myself, “Don’t call her Susie. Don’t call her Susie. It’s Sharon, not Susie.” In the very next nanosecond, I open my mouth and say, “Hi Susie! How are you going with this assignment?”

Everyone in the room has heard me do it – again. A collective sigh, non-verbal but heavily laced with the essence of “Not again!” can be heard. One kid shakes his head at me in an awkward blend of amusement and newly-refreshed disappointment. It’s fair to say that this has probably happened to him before.

Sharon looks at me with an expression that shows she is torn between saying “I’m Sharon!” and rolling her eyes, pretending I didn’t say it, and answering my question.

“I’m so sorry!” I say. “I know you’re Sharon. I don’t know why that happens. It’s certainly not deliberate. It’s just… my brain. It hates me.”

Sharon nods. Unfortunately, she’s heard this enough times to know it’s true. I give her a pathetic, apologetic smile in response, and go back to talking about the assignment.

How can I remember the details of the Industrial Revolution or talk ad nauseum about the literary qualities of Shakespeare’s ‘Much Ado About Nothing’, and still get some poor kid’s name wrong at least once a day?

It isn’t even always the same student. Occasionally, my brain/mouth coordination goes rogue, and I’ll call Kate ‘Lily’ or ‘Rose’, just to keep things interesting. Just once. Just to make things interesting, I’m sure.

This is one of the things that keeps me humble as a teacher. In my job, I’m required to talk to people and use their names in the classroom. And that very basic thing is something that, from time to time but far too often for comfort, I struggle to do.

The ironic thing is that I’m actually really good at remembering faces and names, where I met someone and conversations I’ve had with them. I have to remind myself that not everyone does that when I’m tempted to take it personally that someone hasn’t remembered my name, or having met me before.

I just don’t understand how the wrong name can come out of my mouth so often in every day situations.

The only thing I can put it down to is the brain fog I have carried since I contracted a delightful tropical disease called Ross River Fever in 2011, and which is also typical of fibromyalgia, which I have been left with as the legacy of the RRF. I know the fog is particularly meddlesome when I’m tired or my pain levels are high, but even at times when I am doing okay and enjoying otherwise greater clarity, some autonomous impulse to self-destruct in front of others fires off and I find myself apologising for calling Tom either ‘Dick’ or ‘Harry’.

I think I’m going to have to just start telling my classes at the beginning of each year or semester that it’s likely to happen, it’s not intentional, and I apologise in advance. It’s either that, or resort to calling everyone “Hey You” or just never using their names, neither of which is a terribly professional option, either.

 

Facing the Beast.

Defiant, I stood as tall as I could and faced the huge beast.

Haunted reading room spooks teens
Defiant, I stood as tall as I could and faced the huge beast.

It met my bravado with derision. As time wore on, it was only getting uglier and more insistent.

With all the strength and conviction I could muster, I growled, “As intimidating as you are, remember this: I created you, and I will defeat you.”

And my TBR pile laughed and laughed.

What’s on your list?

What’s on your list?

I’d love to hear your ideas!

Human Girl Person Silly Blond Making A Face Child
I just found that I have a follower on Twitter called “Buy Followers”.
 
Weird.
I haven’t bought that one, or any other.

 
Which leads me to wonder… why would someone even bother?
In a world full of things I *would* buy if I had the cash, followers on social media isn’t going to be among them.
The top three things on my permanent list of things I’d like to buy are:

1. Another, longer trip to Canada.
2. Books. More books.
3. Another Labrador puppy.

What’s on your list?
I’d love to hear your ideas!

Making Your Facebook Pages Easy to Like.

I’ve heard a lot of complaints recently about Facebook removing the “Like Page” button from Facebook page links in comments and posts.

I absolutely agree – it’s a pain.
But I have found another way to share links and like/follow pages more conveniently than having to open every page and click on “like” or “follow”.

If you tag yourself or your page in an individual person’s post, people can hover over the tag and click on the “Like” button in the small window that pops up.

To tag your page, start typing its name. It should cause a small window to appear with your page name in it. Click on the correct option and your page will be tagged.

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Once tagged, your page name should appear highlighted. Then you can keep typing.

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By putting more than one link in your post, you’re saving a lot of work and tidying up those “like for like” threads that can have hundreds of comments in them.

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Keep in mind that this won’t work in groups or on pages, but it does work on individual people’s posts.

To tag your page in a group or page post, you need to do the same thing, but use your page @username instead.

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You can still use more than one tag in each post.

ScreenHunter_424 Jul. 04 18.03

No-vember Supermoon…

So, there’s supposed to be a supermoon tonight. And my inbox had two email alerts that conditions were great for seeing the southern lights – the Aurora Australis.

In fact, ever since I signed up for those email alerts, it’s been overcast or raining every single time the “conditions have been ideal”.

And true to form, it’s pouring rain tonight. The only thing anyone around here is seeing in the night sky is lots of water.

So, what’s a girl to do?
Write nutty poetry. That’s what.

Just for fun, I wrote this and put it up on Twitter. It had a pretty positive response, so the evening has not been a total flop.

november-supermoon

Positive Reviews!

There’s always a bit of trepidation when you do something new and you’re not sure how it’s going to go.

There’s always a bit of trepidation when you do something new and you’re not sure how it’s going to go. ‘Leaf’ has been available for just over three months now, and I’m very thankful and excited to be getting positive reviews.

I don’t want to blow my own trumpet, but I am really thrilled about these two readers’ responses  that I’ve received recently.

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review-nicky-glynn-2016-10-05-10-55-40

Both of these people, and others who have given my writing positive reviews and ratings, have encouraged me more than they realise.  Sometimes being a writer is a really lonely thing, because there’s a whole experience and process you have to go through before you can know if anyone is actually going to understand and connect with what you’ve written.  To know that my poetry has had such an effect on people is both motivating and incredibly humbling.

 

Bohemian Ear Worms.

I’ve had ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ playing on the BrainPod every  single day, often for hours at a stretch. 

It’s a conspiracy. 

My Year 12 English class is reading and studying ‘Life of Galileo’, so every time someone says the name, I hear those two different voices singing “Galileo!” … “Galileo!” … “Galileo!” … “Galileo Figaro!” and it just plays on from there. 

When I wake up in the mornings, it has usually been replaced by another tune. That is, until I get into the car and head to work. 

My favourite radio station has a traffic reporter named Charles Miller. That, apparently, is close enough to hear “CharlesMiller NOOOOO! We will not let you go!” which gets the whole thing playing again in a seemingly endless loop. 

This is what my life has become. 

Awkward #437

Just now in a staff meeting: 
M: “The settings have to be exactly right. You can’t use a Mac, you can’t use Firefox… whatever that is…”

Me: *audible snort*  and immediately thinking “Oops. That was too loud. Awkward.”

Everyone else: *looks at me while suppressing their amusement*

M: “What is it?”

Me: “It’s a browser…”

M: “Okay, now I know. Thanks!”      *continues talking*

Everyone else: Pays attention.

Me: *goes to WordPress*